Thursday, February 10, 2011

True Things

Tonight she sobbed and clung to my neck and her tears wet my cheeks as I sat on princess sheets and held...

...but she hadn't even fallen asleep yet.

And I soothed with shushes and pulled her closer and fanned my hands across her back so she could really feel me holding her and sighed sadly and whispered love.

It's been weeks of colds and fevers here, no one quite back to normal yet, Mama not sleeping well and babies coughing during the night and so very much to do all day and she feels it, my girl. We haven't held much, haven't locked eyes enough, haven't used our words to connect hearts.

So I lay her back gently on the Snow White pillow and wrap my arms tight around her, pinning arms close so she won't think I'm leaving just yet. And I ask,

Will you tell me a True Thing, Eliana? I think she will keep sobbing and shaking her head, eyes closed, but she settles and begins immediately...

Water always splashes... Sniff, sniff.

Apple trees grow apples...

Snakes slither.
Her eyes lock on mine and I smile so big my face hurts.

My eyes have eyelashes. Her smile is found and shares in the joy with mine.

My cheeks are rosy. My eyes are green! I lean in and inhale that place on her temple.

My mama will always have that smile on her face! She imprisons my neck with her fingers and holds me there, and my new tears mingle with her old ones, and I?

I think her last True Thing is a wish, and not always True. It's lowercase true.

So.

I start again. I smile.

And I do so as I tuck her in again and pray powerfully and sing love, and I smile to the doorway, to the notepad, and I laugh out loud over her True Things.

And later I smile from her bedside, sneaking in with a camera to capture the sleeping girl with the rosy cheeks and eyelashed green eyes that is so generous with her smiles.

I will remember that she learned how to smile from me first.

Tomorrow.

6 fellow travelers shared:

Carrie said...

such a beautiful post... I love your heart.

praying for your health, dear friend.

I Live in an Antbed said...

So beautiful it hurts. Crying again. What a precious way to nurture her heart.

~nanashouse~ said...

You simply must, I mean MUST write a book. I will show up at the book signing with freshly baked cookies and lemonade and quietly whisper "I knew her when..."

Kelly Sauer said...

Ever so sweet...

Christine said...

Oh, I wish I was the always-smiling-mama type. I'm sad for how often my to-dos and frustrations take the smile away. But there is always tomorrow!! :)

pettypleasures said...

hi, i've been following your blog for almost 3 years now..and everytime i read your post, i feel renewed. you make motherhood delightful, and through your words i feel closer to God than i was before. You are truly an inspiration. Your family serves as an inspiration! i hope you will let me keep following your beautiful blog! God bless you!

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